Becoming a dad is like having a chubby, drooling dwarf march in and steal your life. You know that carefree existence you had before, where you could go out drinking, see a film in the evening, or go to a restaurant on a whim? That's gone. Now you get excited if you manage to catch a five-minute YouTube clip before the banshee scream erupts in the other room.
And so when ours arrived and I became a first time dad, I was on a pretty steep learning curve. What had that little guy been snacking on in the womb? And it sticks to things and gets everywhere. But with nappies just suck it up and get on with the job. Even if you do need to ask the midwife which way up the new nappy goes.
As a wildly experienced father of three who is a master of parenting, I felt it was time for me to impart some of my wisdom to all you new daddies out there. Upon the birth of a first child , we all feel a little unprepared read: completely freaked out of our minds , and it helps to have access to a little friendly advice , even from me, a doofus dad. The baby adds in stink molecules at around six months. Just get used to the fact now that your carefully arranged, good-smelling, fresh-carpeted home is a thing of the past.
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